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Castration Celebration Kindle Edition
When the girl who’s foresworn men meets the boy who’s devoted himself to picking up women, there’s bound to be drama—perfect for a sixweek summer program devoted to the arts. Olivia’s summer goal: to write a musical that censures men with wandering eyes. Max’s summer goal: to hone his acting skills, along with his talent for attracting the ladies. Before camp is over, they’ll perform Olivia’s musical onstage and in real life—though the ending may turn out differently than either expects.
Jake Wizner’s story within a story takes the battle of the sexes to a whole new level in a bawdy, uproarious romp that’s laugh-out-loud fun.
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherRandom House Books for Young Readers
- Publication dateMay 9, 2009
- Reading age14 years and up
- Grade level9 - 12
- File size907 KB
Editorial Reviews
Amazon.com Review
Jake Wizner on Castration Celebration
I wanted to write a musical, which is a little bit odd because I have only seen two or three musicals in my life and did not particularly enjoy them. But I’ve always loved writing irreverent songs, and I figured that I could write the kind of musical that people who don’t like musicals could also enjoy. I started with the lyrics, and then I built a script around the songs, and what emerged was something outrageous, over-the-top, and really, really funny, at least to me.
I had also been playing around for a long time with the idea of setting a young adult novel on a college campus, because I had spent the first ten years of my life living in a dormitory at Yale. I remembered clearly what kinds of adventures a young boy could have, and I imagined it could be even more fun for kids a little bit older. So that’s kind of how the book came together. Take a group of teenagers, plop them down on a college campus for a summer program where they can be working on a musical, and see what happens.
There’s a scene early in the book where Olivia’s playwriting teacher challenges her students to write not what they know, but what they want to find out. That’s sort of what writing this book was like for me. Whereas Spanking Shakespeare was rooted largely in my own experiences as a teenager, Castration Celebration was really a work of pure fiction. Now I’m at work on a third novel for young adults, a humorous coming of age story of a neurotic, love-starved high school senior who finds himself becoming entangled in the life of a young boy and the immigration politics of post 9-11 America. —Jake Wizner
From Booklist
About the Author
From the Hardcover edition.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Olivia entered her suite to find a Barbie look-alike already there, listening to her iPod and dancing around the common room in impossibly short shorts and a midriff-baring T-shirt. When she spotted Olivia, she smiled hugely and pulled off her headphones. “Oh my God!” she squealed. “I know you. You were right in front of me in line before!”
“Small world,” Olivia said with a smirk.
“I’m Mimi,” Barbie said. “We’re the only ones here so far. You want to share a room with me?” She pointed to the bedroom on the left. “It’s a little bigger, I think.”
Oh God, Olivia thought. She looked toward the bedroom, but did not move.
“Plus it’s got better feng shooey, because the beds are farther from the door.”
Feng shooey? Olivia stifled a laugh. Just for the raw material Mimi would provide, maybe it would be worth it to share. And there really was no graceful way to turn down the offer without hurting Mimi’s feelings. “How can I say no to better feng shooey?” Olivia said, beginning to wheel her suitcase to the left.
Mimi followed her into the room. “How funny is it that we’re roommates and we checked in at exactly the same time? I mean, check-in is all day, so we could have come at any time. It’s like fate, or something, that we ended up roommates, don’t you think?”
Keep a straight face, Olivia told herself, and don’t say anything too sarcastic. She placed her suitcase flat next to her bed and began to unzip it. Maybe if she didn’t respond, Mimi would stop talking.
“I mean what are the chances that we’d be right next to each other at registration? Like a million to one, right?”
“Yeah, it’s a good thing I stopped to get drunk on the way here this morning,” Olivia blurted, “or we would have totally missed each other.”
“Are you serious?” Mimi’s eyes popped wide. “No, you’re kidding.”
“I probably shouldn’t drink when I’m on so many painkillers, but, hey, it’s summer, right?”
Mimi’s expression veered from amusement to serious concern, and Olivia burst out laughing.
“Oh my God!” Mimi squealed. “I totally believed you for a second!”
Olivia shook her head. “Don’t worry, I’m actually a pretty straight arrow. No drinking, no drugs, nothing illegal for me.”
“Well, that’s a relief.” Mimi plopped down on her bed and her voice took on a playful quality. “What about boys?”
“Definitely none of them,” Olivia said decisively.
“Get out!” Mimi shrieked. “Have you seen all the hot guys here?”
Olivia chuckled. Just her luck to get stuck with a nymphomaniac.
In the same dorm, one floor below, Max was unpacking when a tall, skinny guy with long hair walked into the room, wheeling a huge suitcase, wearing a backpack over one shoulder, and carrying a guitar.
“Hey,” Max said.
The guy gave a little nod. “What’s up?”
“I’m Max.”
“Zeke.” He dropped the backpack on the empty bed and leaned his guitar against the wall.
“You here for music?” Max asked.
“Yeah.”
Zeke opened his book bag, fished out a bottle of water, and took a big swig. Then he brushed his hair out of his face and lifted his suitcase onto the bed.
“You’d think with how much money we’re paying we’d get a bigger room, right?” Max said.
“At least some air-conditioning.”
“I know. This room’s like a fucking sauna.”
“You think any of the rooms have air-conditioning?” Zeke asked.
“If they do, I’m requesting a transfer. No offense.”
Max was actually feeling pretty happy about his roommate situation. For all he knew, he might have ended up with a violin prodigy named Vladimir, who practiced eight hours a day and was several years away from either Carnegie Hall or a complete nervous breakdown. Zeke, on the other hand, seemed like the kind of guy who would be up for almost anything. A young Joey Ramone.
“So,” Max said, pointing to Zeke’s guitar. “What kind of music do you play?”
Zeke brushed his hair back with his hands. “I don’t know. Mostly my own stuff, I guess.”
“You in a band?”
Zeke shook his head. “Used to be.”
“What happened?”
Zeke shrugged. “Lead singer kind of dropped out. Band just fell apart after that.”
Max put on his best TV voice. “They had everything going for them: a hit album, a sold-out concert tour, and a multi-record deal, but behind the scenes, trouble was brewing in paradise. In-fighting and drug abuse were threatening to pull the band apart, and when lead singer . . .” He reverted to his own voice. “What was your lead singer’s name?”
Zeke hesitated. “Devin Baines,” he said.
“And when lead singer Devin Baines overdosed on pain?killers just before a sold-out show at Madison Square Garden, it looked like the band’s days were numbered.”
“You watch too much VH1,” Zeke said, turning away.
“Probably,” Max agreed.
Zeke unzipped his suitcase, took out an iPod dock, and put it on the shelf of his desk. “You can use this,” he said, plugging it in, “but no Celine Dion when I’m in the room.”
*??*??*
Upstairs in Olivia and Mimi’s suite, the two remaining girls—Trish and Callie—had arrived, and the foursome was complete. At the moment, they were sitting two and two on the couches in the common room, and Mimi was gushing over Callie’s short, spiky hair and the multiple studs in each ear.
“It’s like so punk rock, you know. Do boys like that?”
Callie seemed mildly amused. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve never asked them.”
“Do you think I’d look good with short hair?” Mimi pulled her hair up and bunched it against the back of her head.
“With your body, you’d look good bald,” Trish said, folding her arms across her stomach.
“Shut up,” Mimi said delightedly. She jumped up and bounded into the bedroom to look in a mirror. A few seconds passed, and then she called, “What’s everyone wearing to dinner tonight?”
Olivia threw a knowing smile at Trish and Callie. “Pretty spectacular, isn’t she?”
Callie rolled her eyes.
“I wasn’t planning to change,” Trish said, as Mimi walked back into the room.
Olivia feigned shock. “You’re going to wear jeans and an oversize Yale T-shirt? With all the cute boys here?”
From the Hardcover edition.
Product details
- ASIN : B00296SVI6
- Publisher : Random House Books for Young Readers (May 9, 2009)
- Publication date : May 9, 2009
- Language : English
- File size : 907 KB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Not Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Sticky notes : On Kindle Scribe
- Print length : 306 pages
- Best Sellers Rank: #2,384,189 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
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Simple in concept, enjoyably complex in execution - the story of Max's pursuit of Olivia is reflected over the course of the book in Olivia's own literary work-in-progress, the eponymous 'Castration Celebration' play, where the two main characters Dick and Jane echo their real-life counterparts. An additional echo is expressed in liberal doses of Shakespeare's " Much Ado About Nothing (Folger Shakespeare Library) ," as Benedick and Beatrice's verbose flirtation refers right back up to the drama of the male and female protagonists both in Olivia's play and Olivia's life. There are layers to this story.
Jake Wizner manages to portray characters which are just stereotypical enough to be believable, without becoming boring or static. Although the situations aren't necessarily typical, they're easily recognizable and almost feel comfortable, easily digestible, and never tiresome. Although I've only read this book and Spanking Shakespeare , Shapiro's other recent work of fiction, it's easy to see that he's got real talent for setting the stage and developing his characters.
Also, there are a few details that feel almost like cameo appearances - the main character is named Max, a name which the author reportedly nearly ended up being given at birth. Also, this book, like his previous one, features a character named Shakespeare.
Finally, MAJOR SPOILER: no one gets castrated in this novel, despite the fact that in Imperial China, eunuchs had their testicles, penis, and scrotum removed, then preserved in alcohol.
After walking in on her dad fooling around with a grad student, Olivia decides that she must write a musical to express her outrage at the situation. Yale University's summer arts camp is the perfect place to craft her masterpiece. Olivia's musical is aptly titled Castration Celebration.
She tries to sequester herself in her dorm suite and finish the daunting task put before her, but Olivia's suite mates aren't going to let her hide out for long. Neither will the handsome Max, a fledgling actor who almost killed Olivia on the first day of camp.
Max is bound and determined to win Olivia's heart - come hell, high water, or castration!
Wizner has written an outrageously funny novel that focuses on the battle of the sexes. High school kids will appreciate how candid the author is with his use of language. Some may feel that it is a bit explicit, but I think that all who read this novel will find the humor in it.
This book would be best enjoyed lounging by the pool with a frosty beverage in hand. A perfect summer read!
Reviewed by: LadyJay
First off, the title is a little misleading or maybe its perfect for this story, it depends on how you view this storyline. The storyline is triggered by Olivia who walks in on some very "undad" like behavior on the part of her dad - this sends Olivia into a tizz - which inspires her to write a play while she is in the arts program for the summer. She enlists the help of her somewhat dysfunctional and odd friends and as time and events develop between these teens, a musical is born.
This book is written for YA and is meant to be funny in a raunchy kind of way. I have no problem with this, but I just could not connect with any of the characters - they all felt somewhat self-serving to me and using the summer as a excuse to basically get raunchy.
I just could not get into this one at all, although it seems to have been highly appreciated by many other readers.