Read an Excerpt
At the outset, I would like you to know that I am not an expert when it comes to relationships. I think we all share a curiosity about the ways in which people interact, and over the years I have found myself wondering about the relationships in my orbit—my parents', my friends', my own. What is it that draws two people together? What is it that keeps people together? What breaks them apart? The answers are infinite and complex. And as we all know, there is a secret language between two people that is rarely expressed—to the outside world and often even between the partners themselves. This book, through its many questions—some playful, some serious—attempts to break this mysterious code as it draws us into a deeper understanding of who we are and how we love.
It's my hope that however you approach this book—with your partner by your side, or individually, imagining how your partner would respond to the questions and choices—you do so with a spirit of adventure and fun. Though some moments will surely require you to summon your courage and reveal painful truths, it is not the intention of the book to provoke arguments and controversy. Be wise, accepting, generous, and fearless. It never hurts to be a little persistent. At times, it may seem as if you are going in two different directions, but in fact you are heading down the same road. Together you will make wonderful discoveries.
And in the end, of course, even after a series of miraculous revelations, love remains the greatest mystery of life. As it should.
—Philipp Keel
WARM-UP
Today's date:
Do you and your partner plan to go through this book together?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
If yes, who will be "A" and who will be "B"?
A, your name:
B, your name:
Your dates of birth:
A:
B:
Your astrological signs:
A:
B:
If you are "B," did you think for a second that you would have preferred to be "A"?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
If you are going through this book by yourself, do you plan to answer for both you and your partner?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
If yes, will you show your partner your answers?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
Which of the seven choices best describes your reason for going through this book?
A:
[ ] You communicate in silence
[ ] It's your anniversary
[ ] You are drunk
[ ] You are curious
[ ] You are suspicious
[ ] Whatever happened to sex?
[ ] Don't ask
B:
[ ] You communicate in silence
[ ] It's your anniversary
[ ] You are drunk
[ ] You are curious
[ ] You are suspicious
[ ] Whatever happened to sex?
[ ] Don't ask
As a child, what were your first words?
A:
B:
What did you want to be when you grew up?
A:
B:
What was your first job?
A:
B:
What did you do with the money you earned from your first job?
A:
B:
When did you leave home?
A:
B:
What or who has had the greatest influence in your life?
A:
B:
Your professions:
A:
B:
Would you mind looking at each other for one minute?
A:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
B:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
If yes, put this book away.
When did you meet?
A:
B:
Where did you meet?
A:
B:
How did you meet?
A:
B:
What did you think when you saw your partner for the first time?
A:
B:
If a pickup line was used, which one of you used it?
What was the line?
A:
B:
How soon after meeting your partner did you begin to have erotic thoughts?
A:
B:
Who initiated the first kiss?
[ ] A
[ ] B
Before spending your first night together, what was your chief concern?
A:
B:
Did you imagine how it would feel to wake up beside your new love after the first night?
A:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
B:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
How much time elapsed between your first and second date?
A:
B:
Did the one who promised to call, call when promised?
A:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
B:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
Was sex everything you dreamed it would be the first time?
A:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
B:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
If no, what was missing?
A:
B:
If yes, what made it wonderful?
A:
B:
Have you known true love?
A:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
B:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
Are you prepared to accept whatever this book may reveal?
A:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
B:
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
