Table of Contents
Introduction: Why I Wrote This Book vii
Part 1 Digging into the Roots of Blame: Where Blame Comes from and How It Works
1 Blame Is Our Most Destructive and Confusing Behavior 3
2 Why Blame Is So Misunderstood: The Mistaken Beliefs of Blame 13
3 Blame Is Deeply Rooted in Our Biology and Our Society 26
4 Blame Is More Than Just a Single Incident 37
5 Blame Comes from Many Directions at Once 46
6 Blame Is a Three-Part Syndrome Initiated by a Blame Attack 67
7 Part Two of the Blame Syndrome: The Emotional Impact 78
8 The Third Part of the Blame Syndrome: The Reactive Response and the Blame Spiral 90
Part 2 Blame Busting: Learning to Use Positive Accountability Instead of Blame
9 What Do I Use Instead of Blame? 105
10 Dilemmas of Dating: Using Positive Accountability in New Relationships 135
11 Marriage: The Proving Ground of Accountability 159
12 Parenting and Positive Accountability 192
13 Using Positive Accountability in the Workplace 213
Part 3 Advanced Work with the Law of Personal Limitations
Introduction to Part Three 231
14 Dealing with Personal Limitations: Always Start with Your Own 233
15 Exploring the Foundations of the Law of Personal Limitations 250
16 Testing the Law of Personal Limitations on Yourself 271
17 Pulling It All Together: Living Beyond Blame 284
The Take-Home Message: Living Beyond Blame 317
