The Barnes & Noble Review
Harold Kushner gets down to the nitty-gritty of life. “We need to know that we matter to the world,” he points out flatly. “At the same time, we need to be assured that we are good people.” In this book, Kushner pushes us to fulfill these two basic human needs in one lifetime: to do well by doing good. He leads us through the thorny issues of self-realization, justice, personal integrity, and relationships in a quest to discover what really matters. And in the end, he shows us what it is to live from the heart -- to feel oriented, rich, and purposeful.
Kushner, rabbi laureate of Temple Israel in Natick, Massachusetts, and bestselling author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People, begins his quest by directing us to value struggle. By sharing with us the biblical story of Jacob wrestling with the angel, Kushner explains what we gain from our attempts at self-realization, in which we fight our own impulses and change our lives. “There are times when we feel that split inside us, part of us wanting to take the easy way out even as another part of us insists on the more demanding route.... It hurts to be defeated by conscience, to feel compelled to take the more demanding high road, to resist temptation, to apologize. But,” Kushner points out, “I suspect it hurts more to keep winning out over conscience.” What we must value, he insists, is not whether we make the right decisions, but whether we grow morally through the process. “When the struggle is over,” Kushner counsels, “we will, like Jacob, be bruised and limping. But...we will be at peace with ourselves in a way we never were before.”
Kushner goes on to revalue forgiveness. Drawing on the story of Joseph, along with contemporary books and films, he focuses, again, on what’s important. “When we thirst for revenge, it isn’t really revenge we are after,” he points out. “We are looking to reclaim a sense of power and dignity that was stolen from us.” Instead of seeking to punish, Kushner suggests, we can get what we need by behaving with the grace we wish others had. “Forgiveness,” Kushner points out, “is a favor we do ourselves.” Kushner goes on to apply his steady wisdom to the issues of personal integrity and interpersonal relationships -- and always, he reorients us to what’s truly important.
In this book, Kushner grapples with the central issues of our lives; his arguments are penetrating, and his advice gentle. Ultimately, he helps us to focus our lives not on winning the argument at hand but on becoming kinder, more forgiving, and steadier of heart. He helps us find out, quietly, what matters.
(Jesse Gale)
Living a Life That Matters is a wonderful, much-needed primer on the truly important things in life. Many thanks to Harold Kushner for reminding us what we should never forget: that success is not in the bulk of your wallet, but in the weight of your character.
Rabbi Kushner's new book is full of the great stories and subtle wisdom that makes him a genuine spiritual leader for us all in a time of considerable confusion. He blends limitless compassion with sharp analysis to offer a way toward integrity. This is a book you don't want to put down or allow to be too far from you in times of crisis.
The latest serving of spiritual nourishment by the author of the 1981 bestseller When Bad Things Happen to Good People concerns a common dilemma: how getting what we want in life seems so often to require compromising our values and integrity. Rabbi Kushner makes the inspiring case that living up to our moral ideals will make us both successful and complete. Kushner's touchstone for this lesson is the Biblical story of Jacob. As a young man, Jacob used cunning and guile to achieve his worldly aims; then, in the strange episode that is the turning point of his life, he wrestles all night with an unseen presence—call it God, an angel or, as Kushner sees it, his own conscience. Jacob ends up bruised and battered, but he also emerges an upright person who goes on to do the right thing, not the easy thing. The moral: Knowing who we have been does not matter as much as knowing what kind of person we aspire to become.
—Eric Wargo
Rabbi Kushner (When Bad Things Happen to Good People, etc.) outlines a common human struggle between the need to feel successful and the need to think of oneself as a good person. Indeed, he relates, the biblical Jacob wrestled with the impulse to succeed through cleverness and fraud, and "to become someone exemplary." While the subtitle might be challenged can't success be more a matter of dedication than ruthlessness? Kushner's wide-ranging, occasionally meandering book fortunately focuses more on the basic question of a meaningful life. Citing examples from both contemporary life and the Bible, he observes that revenge and retribution cannot heal victims, whereas the new trend toward restorative justice (which works "toward the... restoration of the victim" and holds "the offender accountable") might do so. Kushner sees Isaac Bashevis Singer's character Gimpel the Fool as achieving the utmost integrity because he is "the same person all the time." Love and friendship, Kushner writes, not only signify bonds between people, but help bring God into a selfish world. To avoid feeling insignificant, he urges readers to help someone needy and to think not of themselves but of the next generation. He concludes with words that are more comforting than challenging: simply "[b]y being good people" doing honest work, helping a neighbor, delighting a child "we have an impact on the world." (Sept. 15) Forecast: With a 250,000-copy first printing; a Today Show appearance; selection by BOMC, Literary Guild, Traditions and QPB; first serial rights bought by Family Circle and Parade; and simultaneous audio and large-print editions, this will be another Kushner juggernaut. Copyright 2001 CahnersBusiness Information.
Kushner, rabbi laureate of Temple Israel in Natick, MA, addresses the inner question that many readers yearn to have answered: How do I know my life and my choices mean something? He suggests that the path to a truly successful and significant life lies in generosity, friendship, family, sacrifice, and God's forgiving nature. Readers familiar with his When Bad Things Happen to Good People or How Good Do We Have To Be? will be gratified at the further anecdotal and persuasive discussion found here. Kushner offers examples from literature and contemporary history that allow the reader to join the discussion almost effortlessly. His easy-reading, down-home style and commonsensical approach are sure to attract many. Highly recommended for public libraries and essential for collections seeking to offer contemporary views of the sociology and psychology of humanity.Leroy Hommerding, Fort Myers Beach Lib. Dist., FL Copyright 2001, Cahners Business Information.
A valuable companion . . . a set of guideposts for living a useful and fulfilled life, no matter what the future holds.” —The Boston Globe
“A wonderful, much-needed primer on the truly important things in life. Many thanks to Harold Kushner for reminding us what we should never forget.” —Mitch Albom, author of Tuesdays With Morrie
“Full ofÉgreat stories and subtle wisdom....This is a book you don’t want to put down or allow to be too far from you in times of crisis.” —Thomas Moore, author of Care of the Soul
