The Disappearing Girl
Learning the Language of Teenage Depression
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- $12.99
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- $12.99
Publisher Description
Adults are increasingly concerned about the rising rate of depression in teenage girls and the frequency of alarming behaviors including wild conduct, explosive outbursts, back talking, sexual escapades, drug experimentation, and even cutting, eating disorders, and suicide attempts. The Disappearing Girl, the first book on depression in teenage girls, helps parents understand:
• Why silence reflects a girl’s desperate wish for inclusion, not isolation
• Subtle differences between teen angst and problem behavior
• Vulnerabilities in dating, friendships, school, and families
• How, if untreated, girls will carry feelings of helplessness, anger, and depression into adulthood
Dr. Machoian also offers conversation topics to help girls navigate mixed messages, develop their identity, make healthy decisions, and build resilience that will empower them throughout life, as well as helping parents manage their own frustration.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
A former student of esteemed girl expert Carol Gilligan, Harvard researcher Machoian sets out to determine why so many young women seem to emotionally withdraw and to explain how parents and others can help them. According to Machoian, teenage girls begin to "disappear" when they feel disconnected from friends or family, and when the pressures of society (fitting in, staying thin, etc.) become overwhelming. Often, she's discovered, the trouble starts when girls shift from grade school to middle school, or middle school to high school. Though parents and others may see a girl's problems as natural "teen angst," Machoian warns that too often a girl's serious depression is ignored (in the past, she points out, experts did not even believe that teens experienced depression). Fortunately, Machoian claims, there is much adults can do to help, and interspersed among the text's rather weighty case histories are numerous tips for a "whole-girl approach," addressing mind, body, heart and soul with practical solutions. Physical activities, volunteering, proper sleep and diet, supportive peers, coping skills and being with family are all ways to keep girls on track. Most important, Machoian says, parents who listen and talk to their daughters make a crucial difference. (On sale Mar. 21)
Customer Reviews
The Disappearing Girl, Learning the Language of Teenage Depression
I met Dr. Lisa Machoian and some of her family while “chit chatting” around the fire pit at the Seagate Hotel in Delray Beach, Florida (December 2013). I had my iPad Mini with me and was reading a book when they joined the circle. Soon I learned that Lisa had published a book about teenager girls and their struggles with depression. I was intrigued! Using my iPad I found her book, “The Disappearing Girl” and bought & downloaded it as we continued to talk. If it had been a paper bound book I would have asked Lisa to autograph it, but instead agreed to write my “thoughts” after reading her book.
This is a book I needed to read while I was dating. I wish I had just “listen” as my girl friends talk about the bad things that had happen, their heart breaks and their feelings. My behavior and attitude then was expressed perfecting in the song “Break My Stride” by the lyrics, “I sailed away to China…And you said you had to get your laundry cleaned.” I just didn’t “get it.” I wanted to solve their problems. Now I know they were perfectly capable of solving their own problems. I lost wonderful friendships because I didn’t listen, or just hold them gentle while they cried.
Hindsight is 20/20. This is a book that every man should read and think about. There is still time in my life to “Be There and Be Aware” for daughter-in-laws, nieces, grand daughters, girlfriends, etc. Next time I’ll be better prepared to help the people I love. Thank you Lisa for all the time and effort you invested in creating your book, and an apology to my dear friends for my failure to hear you, and be there while you struggled with depression.
Respectfully submitted,
Bob