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Raising a Son: Parents and the Making of a Healthy Man Paperback – November 1, 2004

by Don Elium (Author), Jeanne Elium (Author)
4.2 4.2 out of 5 stars 63 ratings
See all formats and editions
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Purchase options and add-ons

Boys pose special challenges for today’s stressed parents. In Raising A Son, the Eliums embrace the challenges--and the joys--of raising boys with compassion, commitment, experience, patience, and humor. This fully updated and expanded edition follows the psychological development of boys from infancy to young adulthood. Look for new sections on: 
 
• media and violence 
• the “boy code” 
• age-appropriate morality 
• the out-of-control son 
• triggers for aggression 
• when and how to get help
• coping with guilt 
• the highly sensitive son
• triggers for withdrawal 
• why he gets overwhelmed 
• hypersensitivity and ADD 
• the right role models
Previous page
  1. Print length
    348 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    November 1, 2004
  4. Dimensions
    6 x 0.79 x 9 inches
  5. ISBN-10
    9781587611940
  6. ISBN-13
    978-1587611940
  7. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

* Fully revised parenting classic that follows the psychological development of boys from infancy through to early adulthood. Appropriate for new and experienced parents.

* All-new sections on the media and violence, the "boy code" and age-appropriate morality, and the Out-of-Control Son and the Highly Sensitive Son.

* Previous editions have sold more than 225,000 copies.

About the Author

Don Elium is a marriage, family and child counselor. Jeanne Elium is a writer and communications facilitator at the East Bay Waldorf School. They live in Walnut Creek, California.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 1587611945
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Clarkson Potter/Ten Speed; 3rd Revised ed. edition (November 1, 2004)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 348 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9781587611940
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1587611940
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 14.1 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6 x 0.79 x 9 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.2 4.2 out of 5 stars 63 ratings

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  1. Jeanne Elium

    Jeanne Elium

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Customer reviews

4.2 out of 5 stars
4.2 out of 5
63 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Sharon
5.0 out of 5 stars Raising a son
Reviewed in the United States on July 30, 2011
Verified Purchase
A very well-written book with lots of good advice, easy to read and an excellent structure. On the one hand, I learnt so much about the "male mind" that had had me baffled before and, on the other, the book helped me to feel more confident about the approach we had been using by explaining why it is good-rather, necessary- to do certain things and act in certain ways. There are many examles to back up what is being said and the bibliography is excellent. I have nothing but praise for it!
4 people found this helpful
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Diane
5.0 out of 5 stars Best Book on Raising a Son
Reviewed in the United States on July 9, 2021
Verified Purchase
I've used both Raising a Son and Raising a Daughter. Met Don Ellium at a conference and he gave the best talk to parents...we all wanted "Raising a Parent" to be written.
I've used these books as I raised my children and I always got the best advice. I give these books to all my expectant mother friends.
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scoutersal
5.0 out of 5 stars Must have for parents of a boy!
Reviewed in the United States on June 10, 2014
Verified Purchase
My husband and I purchased this book nearly 24 years ago when our son was born. I just purchased the updated version for a colleague expecting a boy in August. She was thrilled to receive it, and I am sure she and her husband will appreciate it over the years as we did.
One person found this helpful
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misurfergirl
4.0 out of 5 stars Boys will be boys
Reviewed in the United States on September 30, 2008
Verified Purchase
This was a pretty good book. It helped me understand that there are quite a few differences between raising a boy and raising a girl, aside from the obvious reasons. If you are a single mother (or the father is absent or not really involved) and are raising a boy by yourself, I would highly recommend this book.
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lauren
1.0 out of 5 stars homophobia alert
Reviewed in the United States on August 21, 2023
Verified Purchase
This book has highly homophobic viewpoints and it boasts them throughout. 0 out of 10 recommend
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SmellyCat
5.0 out of 5 stars Very insightful. I can't wait to put it to ...
Reviewed in the United States on August 21, 2016
Verified Purchase
Very insightful. I can't wait to put it to use with my little boy.
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El Conquistador
5.0 out of 5 stars Love the bowl and the Amber Col
Reviewed in the United States on August 31, 2016
Verified Purchase
Love the bowl and the Amber Col. Conk is fantastic! I've never used shave soaps prior to this but now I'll never go back.
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HunterRunner
5.0 out of 5 stars Accurate and helpful.
Reviewed in the United States on October 31, 2016
Verified Purchase
My spouse and I are both enjoying this book!
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Top reviews from other countries

Safiyyah
5.0 out of 5 stars Useful from about age 2 upwards, Stopped the power struggle for us!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 2, 2008
Verified Purchase
Before I read this book, I was desperate. My 2 year old was driving me bonkers. It was a constant power struggle. This book took me some time (roughly 2 months) to implement the changes within myself and our relationship, but I started with the first step. I stopped smacking!

Smacking was the reason I decided to invest in parenting books because, from my culture smacking is the solution to all deciplinary problems. Spare the rod and spoil the child. I however noticed that what was intially an extreme disciplinary measure had now become the first measure, whatever my excuses were. I wasn't happy about this so I decided to see about other options because I didn't want to go down this route, I recognised that my upbringing was what had given me these ideas and I didn't know any other way so I needed to learn new ways.

With my new knowledge and understanding we have a much better bond and I have a different way of dealing with "misbehaviour" and also more considerate about his side of things so am more fair. 2 months on, am very pleased!!!
25 people found this helpful
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Serenity
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 24, 2016
Verified Purchase
Fab!
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GUI
1.0 out of 5 stars “Good condition” = awful
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 12, 2021
Verified Purchase
This paperback was described as being in “good condition”. In fact it turned out to be extremely shabby, curled and yellowing cover and pages, and, most annoying, contained heavy underlining for the first quarter of the book. I had intended to give it to a friend, but it is not fit even to donate to a charity shop. Now I have all the trouble of recycling it, muttering NEVER USE THIS SUPPLIER AGAIN!!
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Amazon Customer
2.0 out of 5 stars Ok book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 7, 2021
Verified Purchase
Being a single mum , book isn't for me. All agains single mothers , maybe I am just taking it wrong , but not enjoyable.
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N76
1.0 out of 5 stars Paperback Edition Is Antiquated
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 1, 2011
Verified Purchase
I received the paperback edition and was quickly turned off by what I was reading. Everything about the book suggests old research and stereotypes. In essence, men are men who are prone to aggression because they have a lot of testosterone. More recent studies suggest new insights. I am not sure about this book - I found the paperback an incredible let down. But if you are interested in historical insights regarding attitudes towards boys and men back in the 90s (20 years ago), then this is the book for you! Otherwise, don't go there. I am having two boys and wanted to know more about this but I will stick to what I did before and raise them to be well rounded people first and men second.
One person found this helpful
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