Runners of North America: A Definitive Guide to the Species

Runners of North America: A Definitive Guide to the Species

by Mark Remy
Runners of North America: A Definitive Guide to the Species

Runners of North America: A Definitive Guide to the Species

by Mark Remy

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Overview

If there's one thing that Mark Remy knows, it's running. After 25 marathons and a career of writing for and about runners in Runner's World, he is well equipped to dissect the running world and the odd creatures that make up its population.

The North American Runner has evolved greatly over the years, adapting to changes in environment, including new threats, technologies, food sources, and fashion. These mysterious, brightly clad creatures live side by side with humans, but how many of us truly understand them?

In Runners of North America, a comprehensive guide to the 23 subspecies of runners (ranging from The Newbie to The Gear Addict), humor writer Mark Remy presents the tools to observe and communicate with runners in their natural habitat. With chapters like "Diet and Nutrition" and "Mating Habits," Runners of North America examines and explains the lives of runners from every conceivable angle--while delivering plenty of laughs along the way.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781623366148
Publisher: Harmony/Rodale
Publication date: 04/05/2016
Series: Runner's World
Sold by: Random House
Format: eBook
Pages: 160
File size: 9 MB

About the Author

Mark Remy is a writer and runner based in Portland, OR, where he lives with his wife, two children, dog, and cat. He spent more than 7 years at Runner's World, the world's leading running publication, before leaving in 2014 to become a writer at large. He is the author of RunnersWorld.com's popular Remy's World column and author of The Runner's Rule Book, The Runner's Field Manual, and C is for Chafing.

Read an Excerpt

CHAPTER 1

RUNNERS: A BRIEF HISTORY

THANKS TO THE FOSSIL RECORD and early editions of Jim Fixx's The Complete Book of Running, we know that the species we recognize today as "runners" flourished in North America beginning circa 1977.

Back then, the landscape was much different. Hair was longer; shorts were shorter. Marathons, whose fields were thin1 compared with today's, were still seen as exotic and strange. Women were rarely spotted running in public. And Starbucks had not yet expanded beyond its single store in Seattle to bring its clean public restrooms to every city from coast to coast.2

Most notably, runners themselves were much more rare. While today's runners may be considered oddballs, the runners of yesteryear were seen as downright crazy, when they were seen at all. The runners of today owe a debt of gratitude to these early pioneers, who made it seem okay to venture onto public roads wearing what is essentially underwear and to bounce up and down while waiting to cross the street.

While their dress and hairstyles differed greatly, in certain other ways the earliest runners bore an uncanny resemblance to the runners of today-- they were often lean and hungry-looking, wore unusual footwear, and sometimes identified themselves by wearing numbers on their chests.3

DID YOU KNOW?

Runners and humans share more than 98 percent of their DNA.

Runner Relic
The Terrycloth Headband


In addition to their long hair and sideburns, early runners often boasted lush terrycloth headbands. Over time these accessories, which conferred no real competitive or evolutionary advantage, atrophied and disappeared. You might see a smaller, vestigial headband today, but nearly always it is part of a costume or a self-conscious "throwback" to an earlier era. The last sincerely worn headband in the wild was seen in 1984.

Q&A

Q: My father, who ran marathons as a young man in the 1970s, has told me that at his peak he ran in the 2:45 to 2:50 range and that he routinely finished in the middle of the pack! Is he suffering from the early stages of dementia?

--Nick, Fort Wayne, Indiana

A: No! Well, maybe he is. But his marathoning anecdotes aren't evidence of it. In the 1960s and '70s road racing was much more competitive. By definition, anyone who entered a marathon back then was a Serious Runner, interested not only in bettering his own personal-best time but also in beating those around him. (Back then, marathon-running was virtually a male- only endeavor.) Today, with marathon fields much larger and much slower (on average), a 2:45 may well get you a top 10 finish, depending on the size of the race. This causes Serious Runners (page 32) no end of grief.

RUNNERS THROUGH THE DECADES

The North American runner has evolved over the years, adapting to changes in his environment, including new threats, technologies, food sources, and fashion--even to changes seen in other runners. Here is an overview.

1950s
Fashion: 
Baggy shorts and simple leather shoes
Technology: Analog stopwatch held by man wearing fedora and wool trousers
Diet: Meat and potatoes
Hair: Crew cuts or Brylcreem-assisted styles; no facial hair
Quirks: Says things like "gee" and "swell"
Physiology of Average Specimen: Lean, strong

1960s
Fashion: 
Short shorts; cotton tees or tank tops; canvas sneakers; gray sweats
Technology: Wristwatch
Diet: Grains and vegetables; pasta; brown rice
Hair: Longer and bushier, including facial hair
Quirks: Thinks a woman's uterus will fall out if she runs a marathon
Physiology of Average Specimen: Lean, strong

1970s
Fashion: 
Shorter shorts; brand-name running shoes made of synthetic materials; tube socks; headbands
Technology: Simple digital watch; pedometer
Diet: Granola; wheat germ; yogurt
Hair: Moderately long, sometimes feathered; remarkable mustaches
Quirks: May call self "jogger" and be okay with that
Physiology of Average Specimen: Mostly lean, pretty strong

1980s
Fashion: 
"Sweat suits"; matching "jogging" outfits
Technology: More advanced digital watch; Sony Walkman
Diet: Lean Cuisine; fat-free cookies; salt tablets
Hair: Ample and hair-spray-hardened or permed
Quirks: Time spent drying hair postrun often surpasses time spent running
Physiology of Average Specimen: Average

1990s
Fashion: 
Nylon "tracksuits"; polyester running shorts; bright colors
Technology: Even more advanced digital watch; Breathe Right strip across nose
Diet: Sports drinks; energy bars; primitive energy gels; lots of pasta
Hair: Lower volume; possibly gelled or moussed
Quirks: Believes that stuffing self silly with spaghetti will lead to better marathon times Pretty average

2000s
Fashion: 
"Technical" tees; nylon shorts;
Technology: FuelBelt iPod; GPS watch
Diet: Sports drinks; energy bars; advanced energy gels; more pasta
Hair: Lower volume; little to no gel or mousse
Quirks: May be seen wearing FuelBelt even in a 5-K
Physiology of Average Specimen: Some extra padding

2010s
Fashion: 
Compression socks; even more "technical" clothing
Technology: Activity-tracking bracelet; iPod; smartphone
Diet: Dozens of new sports drinks, energy bars, and gels; "ancient grains"; meat; gluten-free crackers
Hair: Short, unremarkable
Quirks: Often pays to run in crowded races, then isolates self with earbuds or headphones
Physiology of Average Specimen: Extra padding

Uniquely among known species, runners evolve on a macro and micro level-- that is, runners as a group evolve over decades, while an individual runner may himself evolve over the course of his life. This evolution may occur even down to the supermicro level--for instance, a runner's feet may evolve over the course of her running life, from smooth and attractive to gnarled and calloused.

It is thought that the progenitor of all North American runners was likely a farmer or laborer who migrated to the continent from Europe, crossing the Atlantic in the cargo hold of a steamship in search of free bagels.

Today runners can be found on all seven continents, in habitats ranging from cramped urban settings to sprawling rural countryside.


1 In at least two senses of the word.
2 Where did runners use the bathroom before Starbucks came along? No one knows.
3 Well, not on their chests. I mean on the front of their shirts.

Table of Contents

Anatomy of a Runner viii

Introduction x

Part I

Chapter 1 Runners: A Brief History 3

Chapter 2 The 23 Subspecies of Runners 11

Part II

Chapter 3 Diet and Nutrition 83

Chapter 4 Physiology and Psychology 91

Chapter 5 Language and Communication 103

Chapter 6 Social Behavior and Mating Habits 113

Part III

Chapter 7 Living Among Runners 123

Chapter 8 Studying and Observing Runners 129

Endnote: Trends and Predictions 139

Appendix 143

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